Marriage…Best Before:?? ?? ????

On this hot, really sunny Saturday afternoon, Mo’ was so spent n thirsty; she had spent the better part of the day cleaning n she needed to revitalize. So, she stepped out to the corner shop to get a bottle of Viju Apple juice. Viju safe in hand, she’s about to unscrew when something just tells her to check the expiry date. Lo’ n behold, it was 6 months past its shelf life. There was no way Mo’ was gonna take that. She returned the juice n got her refund. Good thing the content was still intact.

How many of us check the expiry date of products especially food n meds before buying n consuming ‘em? I know I used to n somehow along the way, I forgot to but now, I am back in the business. Can’t be having ill health due to my carelessness, that’s a luxury I cannot afford. If you ain’t in the habit of checking, I suggest, scratch that, I plead that you imbibe it. You never know. There’s a reason manufacturers put the expiry date on their products. It means you would only get the best out of it before that date, anytime after n what you get is something substandard. Well, if I spend to purchase, it better be the best I could get. It’s my hard earned money we are talking about! Lol!

Ok! So people, what about marriage? Should brides n grooms come with expiry dates too? Lucy bearing a sign- ‘Yo! You better come marry me before xx-xx-xxxx if you wanna get the best outta me!’ ‘A day after n my value n worth keeps reducing, grab me now!’ Something like that.

Each time I tell people I aint in a relationship presently, they look at me or react like I have grown horns on my head n ask, ‘what is wrong?’ ….SMH…. I really try not to get offended. I guess society has just made it that a girl my age should be in a serious relationship headed for marriage or even be married! A pikin like me. Why would a 27/28 years old lady be without a man when she’s expected to be married before 30 after which she would be considered to have married late? I ask, by whose standards?

Marriage I believe is a beautiful institution God created for two individuals to come together n unite to fulfill purpose. It’s should be a sacred union, merging the values, beliefs, visions n souls of two people. I believe next to choosing to live for God, picking a marital partner is about the most important decision a person could make. You best be getting it right, because, it would shape n determine the course of your life. So, we know how serious this step is n how it needs to be approached carefully n prayerfully. Why then are people so much in a hurry to get into it, they don’t take the time to get it right? It is going to be for a lifetime, what would a few ‘extra’ years hurt to get it right? What is the rush? At this point I think I hear someone say, ‘Are you normal?’

I had an argument with a friend awhile back n he was telling me to say ‘yes’ to a chiker he happened to think would be good for me. He felt time wasn’t really on my side n I really cannot afford to be too choosy. I tried not to go ballistic on him, trust me it took all my will power ‘cos I knew he was just looking out for me. It sounded so wrong to me. Why would I settle? Because time isn’t on my side? Do I have an expiry date? A lot of ladies want to be married before 30, that seems to be the assumed ‘best-before’ marriageable date for ladies. A year after that n you are considered to marry late. Again, I ask- by whose standards? Has the society now become God to sit over n judge my life?

I have no oppositions to marrying ‘early’ enough. Personally, I would have loved to be married by 26/27 but right now, it doesn’t appear to be happening, so, shall I go jump into the lagoon because people cannot deal with it? Shall I jeopardize my future with hasty decisions because I want to conform to the expectations of the society n people around me?

Hey, do you feel me? Do you feel like time is running out on you n you have not a single suitor in sight? Do you feel like you have been too choosy n have probably chased away the man for you hoping you would meet Mr. Right? Do you feel you have passed the ‘marriageable age’ n you just have to get used to being with yourself? Hold that thought! Now, crush it! It’s never too late! Despair not! He owns time n if He hasn't said it is too late, then it is not!He makes all things beautiful in HIS time, not your time, not the society’s time but HIS time. Delay is not denial! It may seem like He’s forgotten about you, but Lady, Mister, He’s only working out the best for you.  You only need to keep your hope n faith alive n keep working on n preparing yourself.

Hold up now. There’s a balance. You also have to take an inward look. You have to ask yourself some questions. Are you doing the right things? Are you positioning yourself? Are you sowing the right seeds? Have you prepared yourself? Are your standards n demands reasonable? Have you prayed n sought God? If you have done all these, then please ease your mind n keep trusting God, He will make it happen. Better to have a ‘late’ marriage than an unhappy one or ‘early’ divorce.

Just because Mandy got married at 25, n Katie, 28 doesn’t mean it has to be same for you. Maybe God wants you married at 40! Is that so hard to believe? I know a number of people would disagree with me on this but I tell you if I have to wait till 40 to get it right, I would, rather than settle for/manage something I know is not for me. Guyz, you haven’t found the right one for you n the clock is ticking? Please, keep looking, there sure is that one for you n if the clock bothers you so much, just take out the battery, it definitely would stop ticking (if you know what I mean). Lol!

The only standards n words I want to live by are God’s n if He says it ain’t too late for me n that His thoughts towards me are of good, not evil to bring me to my expected end, n that things will be beautiful in His time, then I think I just wanna focus on getting ready for that time. My energy shall be expended on ‘waiting’ for my harvest. I shall henceforth be oblivious to what society has to say about my relationship status but hold on to 

His promises.

 

Who’s with me?

Much love!