So, here I am at this mall *window shopping*
and then I spot this really cute footwear. Now, knowing how unique my stature
is and how my size is hard to come by (yea, really unique things come in small
packages *wink*), I am sorely tempted to make the purchase. Then the deliberation
begins; I remember the ones I have sitting in my rack back home yet to be worn,
the stuff I just bought last week and how I promised myself I needed a purchase
leave. But the slippers seemed to have my name on it and I could hear it whispering,
saying ‘you know how good I can make you look’. Then I imagine myself stepping
out in it, complete with the right outfit and accessories (smh). That was my undoing, for the slippers made it home with me,
oh and two other outfits as well.
Ok, who was I deceiving? I was on a purchase
leave, yet, I went ‘window shopping’ and took my credit card along. I set
myself up and no, my bank account wasn’t pleased with me. I knew further
purchase wasn’t the best for me at that time, it really wasn’t what I needed
and I shouldn’t have done it, but I damned the consequences and did it anywayz…..setting
back my budget and hurting my finances.
‘Guard your heart with all diligence for it
will direct the course of your life’. Even in the mundane things, in every
decision and choice, our hearts are involved. Whatever will manifest in your
life must first of all take root in your heart, if it’s not implanted there, it
won’t last. The heart is the staying strength that provides stability and
firmness; stability in values, principles and character. This is why the
instruction about guarding our hearts is pertinent, because just as it requires
quite some effort to uproot a firmly rooted tree from the soil, so it is to
uproot destructive habits and relationships from your heart and life. You can
cut the stump but if the root is still there, it’s just gonna grow right back.
To successfully deal with issues, we have to get to the root and get it out,
only then would it cease to re-occur. See, what you know in your head cannot be
compared to the knowledge that wells from your heart because that feedback has
taken time to process, grow and re-produce.
I have come to learn that my heart and head have a relationship going
on…..took awhile before they let me in on it though. Sometimes, they are in
sync and other times, they have a beef. At these times, they usually wear me out
and I find myself in a referee position, trying to decide who wins the tussle
in that instance. I really think they should put up that facebook status
sometimes, ‘it’s complicated’. Heart is trying to gain the upper hand, head
isn’t having it and at the end of the day, I am just exasperated because
really, they should be working together…..for my good.
Here’s how it works for me; when I learn
something new, get a new revelation or insight, my head is usually the first to
catch on, not always but usually. In trying to process and pass the new
information to a fertile ground where it can grow and produce fruit (my heart),
some things try to block it. They come in different forms: fear, unbelief,
doubt, insecurity, low self-esteem, etc. – all emotions. If I haven’t erected
the right barricade, these unwanted guests will come in to choke the new
seed/word/info I just obtained and suck the life out of it rendering it
powerless. However, if it indeed can gain root in my heart and grow, it would
produce tremendous changes in my life.
The spirit that governs a man’s life
influences the state of his heart and the quality of his life. Even God deals
with us based on the state and meditation of our hearts and this depicts just
how important the heart is and in no way undermines it. However, there are
times when the heart can weak, slow or stubborn in accepting what is right and true
and these are the times when leading your heart is more expedient than
following it, I'm just saying you are the boss of what you lead, not what you
follow so stop ‘following your heart’.
You know that you should let that guy go
because he keeps abusing your emotions but you can’t seem to find the strength
because your heart is weak and hurt. Your head is harping on the fact that you
deserve better than a woman who manipulates you just for her gain but you are
too entranced with her physical beauty and the sex you are getting. Yes, you
know you deserve better, you hear it, you have the knowledge but you can’t seem
to find the strength to make the change. Here’s what I propose……how about you
do what you KNOW to be right, true and just and then deal with the emotions
that come up after? How about you let the knowledge you have make the decision
for you this time and then allow your emotions to catch up with it? It may take
awhile and involve some healing process but I can guarantee that your emotions will
eventually come into sync with your heart.
Choices made sentimentally or emotionally
cannot be compared with a knowledge based decision. If you ask me, I’d say the
choice of who you get to spend the rest of your life with should be made based
on what you know and not what you feel. I find that I can be so
emotionally involved with someone and possibly ‘in love’ but if there is an ish
that presents incompatibility, I promptly let go. I ain’t gonna front and say
it ain’t hard but perhaps because I know how important my choices are,
especially this type of choice, I do what I need to do, what is best for me
knowing my heart will eventually be fine.
Knowing isn't good enough, we have to apply
the knowledge we have to experience true victory in our lives. You have the
knowledge in your head, but you require the will that only comes from your
heart to make it happen. Don’t wait for your feelings to get the memo, you do
what you gat to do and it would eventually catch up, it wouldn't have a choice.
Mo’ Omoregee 2013
